What you need to do to get ahead in 2012

The greatest people in business have certain attributes in common. Several personal qualities are important, like a thirst for continuous education, personal drive and motivation, strong goals and ambition, clear vision, and always a great deal of passion.

Beyond those personal qualities though, what makes a successful business person stand out from the crowd? Here are 5 planning skills you need if you want to get ahead:

Planning

1. Strategic - A business that lurches from one crisis to another is not going to stay around very long. Obviously if you are in charge then you have to set your goals or objectives. Can you clearly see the road ahead?

2. Project - Project management makes your life and that of your team less stressful and gets things done on time and on budget. It might not be the white knuckle ride that some enjoy but at least you will be able to clock off at a reasonable hour!

3. Financial - The top reason why businesses go out of business is bad financial planning. All the cash flows in the wrong direction and in the wrong hands. Someone needs a firm grip on the numbers and it had better be you otherwise someone might just take a trip at your expense.

4. Risk - I'm a natural worrier which though it annoys my family, does have the advantage in business that I tend to see the potential potholes in any plan. If you can imagine a risk you can set about to mitigate it.

5. Logistics - Money is just one resource you need. Any business has inputs and outputs. You need to have the right people in the right jobs with what they need when they need it to get their work done. Logistics could make you a hero in your office.

I will be back with more tips next week on Creativity

Valentines Pressures - Or Not...?

Even before the first of us was considering packing away the Christmas decorations for yet another year the gift card retailers were availing us with visual reminders that Valentines Day was around the corner.

In a relationship? What thoughts does Valentines Day evoke in your mind?

"What should I buy her?" "I don't want her to think I'm a cheapskate?" "What did we do last year?" "When should we book the table?" "Will she be expecting a proposal half way up the Eiffel Tower?" "Will he tell me he loves me?" "Will he get the hint if I keep stopping outside the jewellers?" "Do I still want to be with him?"

But what is it really all about?

You could be forgiven for not knowing that Valentines Day is named after early Christian martyrs named Valentine and was established by Pope Gelasius I in 500 AD. The day first became associated with romantic love in the circle of Geoffrey Chaucer in the Middle Ages, when the tradition of courtly love flourished.

You are, however, unlikely to be forgiven if you write your ex's name on the card!

If in a relationship, Valentines Day does permeate our subconscious mind and asks us to consider our partners in the relationship and our feelings towards them. "Does my heart still skip a beat when I think of him?" "If not, does that mean that I no longer love him?"

Valentines Day does offer us a great opportunity to cast our minds back to when the relationship first began.

Did we both consider what we actually wanted from the relationship at outset? If so, did we share those thoughts with each other at the time? Have we both consciously made an effort to strive towards what we wanted from the relationship? Have our aspirations changed as the relationship and our lives have moved on? How do we know that we our relationship is actually working?

Relationships are no different from other areas of our lives in which we seek fulfillment. We identify what is that we want (a goal) and we strive towards achieving that goal.

By listening and asking you questions which help you to consider what you want, by when, and what success will look and feel like, a coach has helped you to take the first steps towards fulfillment. A good coach will go on to ask you to consider how you will go about reviewing your progress towards your goals, as the journey is not always a smooth one and you may want to feel like you are making it alone. Your coach will be happy to support you along the way, but your coach will not be doing his/her job properly if a dependency relationship has been created.

Relationships can bring us many joyous moments however, like many things in life, they are not always easy, and they need to be worked at.

It is therefore worth considering that if we didn't know what we wanted when we started out in the relationship then what are we working towards?

Happy Valentines Day,

Martyn Ellis,
Life and Business Coach
Email - ellis_m3@sky.com
Mob - 07875 188467

The Future of Dating 2011

Matchmaking is getting a 2011 makeover. Here are the hottest ways to send your love life into a different dimension. Get ready for take off…

1. Pull with a pooch
Canine dating (for their owners, not the pooches!) is one of the latest crazes to come out from the US to the UK, where singletons are shunning bars for parks hoping that their pets will be conversation starters – and show they’re the caring type.

2. Tweet-up
Whether you’re a Twaddict who is always on twitter, or a novice who doesn’t know their @ from their elbow, we have news: the social networking site is the place to meet men and women and look out for tweet-up singles events soon to be launched by Mistry Marketing & Events.

3. Date on TV
Forget Take Me Out, the new matchmaking show is Dinner Dates, and it’s already been on our screens on ITV1 in the afternoons. In each episode, a man or a woman chooses from 5 menus put forward by members of the opposite sex, and then selects 3 peoples they’d like to meet based on the menu. After the dinners, they choose their favourite to go on a proper date with.

4. Blind dinner date
Why not sign yourself up to one of those foodie options instead? Blind Dinner Dates: These take place over a meal in a local restaurant, where you’ll be part of a group of guys and girls looking for love visit whenthemusicstops.com. Wine Tasting: Try some new tipples, meet a guy or girls that whets your appetite (hopefully), and come home with some phone numbers as well as a hangover visit winedater.co.uk or urbansocial.com

5. Singles Social Events
The premise is simple: cool bar and equal numbers of single men and women + alcohol = fun times! Well that’s the theory behind Mistry Marketing & Events Singles Social Events. You can cherry pick the people you want to speak to without the time restrictions. But if you’re not brave enough to go up to a girl or guy that you like the look of, even with dutch courage? This is where my team comes in, we will approach members of the opposite sex on your behalf and set up a one to one where you can find out whether you’re compatible. Visit mistrymarketingevents.co.uk for up coming events

6. Pimp your profile
Getting your internet dating profile to stand out (in a good way) is tough. So why not hire a new kind of love coach who can give your profile a makeover see October to December posts from guest bloggers who can help mistrymarketingevents.blogspot.com/

7. Try iDating
Could your phone find you love? Maybe! On the iPhone you can download a nifty little app called StreetSpark, which tells you about men in your area who match your interests. Look at your profiles and either ‘spark’ or ‘extinguish’ them. If they ‘spark’ back start chatting visit streetspark.com

Still Single?
Make it your new years resolution to find love in order to make it happen
1. Make your goals
2. Be proactive attend events etc
3. Follow through it’s the 21st century don’t wait for the man to make the call, ‘cease the day’ chivalry can be shown another day!
4. Be clear, open, honest, communicate.…..and be happy

Its Tough Being Single at Christmas

It is tough for many being single at Christmas
Says Maureen Fearon, love Guru.

“With a passion for single people working towards dream relationships, I know what pain Christmas can cause. So let’s look at what happens to make it so tough?

Christmas is a time of gatherings. Family and friends that maybe you don’t see often (and some you don’t like!) will be asking for updates and talking like a judge at the end of a trial, summarising and concluding! Yes they don’t want to hear the details of what has gone on, for example (real life examples from clients):
 So you have dated 4 guys and you are still single
 So you single again!
 It’s a shame, you still haven’t found anyone
 And there are so many fish in the sea yet you can’t catch one
 Another year passes and you’re not getting any younger, its worrying isn’t it!
 And there’s nothing really wrong with you yet you haven’t got a girlfriend or boyfriend again!
 It must be hard being all alone at Christmas
 Here is the family’s sad singleton!
 It’s no wonder you are single, you don’t suit that extra weight!

These statements were said by people who care and did not have any intention of causing hurt, but it can still hit the heart!

So what can we do about it?

First look at what normally happens to cause you upset, feeling alone or uncomfortable and plan for it to be different. Most people don’t realise how upsetting they are because no one tells them. Prepare responses with people who normally say unhelpful things. You can look into hypnotic language for this if you want to be really skilful and make it fun, but in the meantime here are two options:
1. Auntie (Foi, Masi or Kaki), you’re not going to mention my love life and upset me this year are you?
2. Uncle (Fuji, Masa or Kaka), when you said xxxx it really hurt and upset me, what was it you intended to do?...........they will probably be mortified that they have upset you. “So you will avoid any reference to my love life wont you?”

They both work. It’s best to rehearse these conversations so they come easy to you if you need to use them.

The joy of being in love and sharing a fulfilling life is priceless. Use Christmas time as an opportunity to plan your success in finding love.

So, where to start? Well, like planning an adventure, there needs to be a goal and a plan of action. Step one, most importantly YOU! The more we understand ourselves the more we know what makes us happy.
Christmas is an ideal time to consult with a coach (a friend or a professional coach) or therapist to get you on the right road. Aim to build the best you and have support through the potential challenges of the dating journey– e.g.

• Overcome the baggage that happens to us all – understand it, disarm it.
• Rebuild confidence. (People like people with good confidence. Bullies and control freaks like people with low confidence as they are easier to manipulate)
• Identify the right partner for you
• Write a true, attractive internet profile.
(Pictures should show your most attractive look. (Get a friend or your coach to help you)
• How can I improve my communication with potential partners (more complicated that we imagine)
• Deal with rejection – The fear of rejection is the biggest stopper to finding love! The hurt people have from past relationships can damage future relationships and cause emotional problems
• Understand the changes in the cycle of relationships
• Focus on what is best for you
• Learn the skills of flirting – there are so many benefits
• Dream! There are many benefits to dreaming (we don’t have time to go into it here-trust me on this and just try it.)

Plan to make the journey to being in love enjoyable and successful. Planning it at Christmas time can bring a sparkle to your eyes. And remember action leads to making things happen. It can happen faster than you think!

If you're serious about wanting to find love, do what ever it takes – go to workshops, events, have coaching or therapy etc. It’s worth it to find love and that wonderful relationship which may transform your life to ultimate happiness and joy.

May you have the Happiest Christmas ever!”

Maureen X
Call 0161 406 5900, 07901 675726 0r email
maureen@wooschool.co.uk
www.wooschool.co.uk

Are you Connecting?

How are your goals going and are you becoming more attractive? Be patient… as the Guinness advert used to say – Good things come to those who wait.

For my final article I would like give you some support on connecting better with the people you meet, this in turn will improve your interactions and boost your confidence. After all now that you have your goals and you are beginning to attract the dream relationship into your life I guess you want to feel confident in your interactions.

When you talk to your best friend it’s likely your in natural rapport, you are comfortable and it just feels right. How would it be if you could connect like this in your romantic relationships like when you go on a date? Well you can… by following some simple steps you can make a better connection and leave a lasting impression:

Body Language – watch how the other person is holding their body posture and mirror this slightly. For instance, if she is tilting her head then you should mirror this. Likewise if he is sat with his legs crossed taping his feet then without becoming obvious you could match this. There are many other physical aspects we could be in rapport with; these also include speed of blinking, depth of breathing and how often you smile!

Our Words – the language we use is very personal to us, our words and how we say them can be matched to create rapport. When talking to somebody you may use their power words, those words they seem to say often and especially with enthusiasm. Matching how the other person talk is also a great way to connect. If they speak slower than you then I suggest you slow down a little and visa versa for fast talkers.

Listen Carefully – nothing is more annoying when somebody doesn’t listen, if you truly want to build rapport then I suggest you listen to the other person like they were the only person in your life at that time that mattered to you. When you listen you show the other person you are interested – this will make them more interested in you. Remember, we were born with 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason!

I hope the 3 blogs have been of interest to you and that they help you in your relationships. Thank you to Shilpa for inviting me as her guest blogger.

Best Regards,
Adam
Adam Eccleston works professionally as a confidence coach helping people achieve more in life. Visit his website for more information. www.adameccleston.com

Are you Attractive?

Welcome to my 2nd guest blog for Shilpa at mistry Marketing & Events, I hope you enjoyed my 1st blog on setting relationship goals. This weeks blog follows on perfectly from setting goals, however if relationship goals aren’t for you then that’s OK because if you’re an attractive person you might not need them…

So, are you an attractive person? I guessing right now your thinking; I am a good looking, are my teeth white enough, do I have a nice smile and am I really sexy? Well stop right there because I am not referring to how good you look in a pair of speedo shorts or a silky dress!

Being attractive as a person is all about attracting all the things and in this case the right person into your life. I believe that you simply cannot go chasing after the person you want even if you have set your relationship goals. The benefit to defining the perfect relationship for yourself is that your sub-conscious mind knows what you want. The subconscious mind is our personal servant, it responds to what we tell it – even more so it can attract the ideal relationships you choose to focus on. How this all works is beyond the scope of this blog, but if your curious I would recommend you read up on the law of attractive or the power of the sub-conscious mind.

The key to attracting the perfect partner is knowing the type of person and relationship you really want and focusing on that all day. By focusing on what you do want all day, you simply begin to set the momentum of attracting the circumstances you want. But remember you get what you focus on all day, so don’t focus on the fact that you are single or are unhappy about your relationships. Instead stay focused on what you do want and act as if your have this already.
Be appreciative of all the good things you have in your life right now and find as many ways to feel good about yourself. When you feel good – you allow your dreams and goals to manifest in your life!

To keep all this simple I offer you the following action steps to becoming an attractive person:
1. Follow blog 1 and define what you really want.
2. Stop focusing on what you don’t have.
3. Start to appreciate what you do have.
4. Act as if you already have your perfect relationship – feel good!
5. Be an attractive person and allow the perfect partner to find you.

Best Regards,
Adam
Adam Eccleston works professionally as a confidence coach helping people achieve more in life. Visit his website for more information. www.adameccleston.com

Relationship Goals

I would like to thank Shilpa for inviting me onto her blog for a series of short articles that will help you envision and attract your perfect soul mate. This is a new area for me as my usual role as a coach involves helping people and businesses set exciting goals and supporting them to develop the confidence to achieve them.
Goal setting is applied by most successful people and businesses because it allows them to be clear about what hey actually want and then set a plan towards achieving it. It’s no different in finding your perfect relationship. But what exactly does that person look like and what specific characteristics are you looking for in your perfect partner?

The main reason I recommend you take the time to set a relationship goal is because you will have defined your perfect relationship, isn’t that what you want? Or are you willing to settle for 2nd best and maybe a person who isn’t right for you. By setting yourself a clear goal you are making a choice to take control of your life and the people you attract into it.

How to set relationship goal:
By following the SMART goal setting process you can set relationships goals that define who you want, why you want that person, as well as setting a plan of action around achieving your goal.

1. Specifically describe the person you want: how do they look, how old are they, where do they come from, what job do they have, what is there attitude to life, what values do they have, what is so special about this person? What other things are you wanting in this person?

2. Don’t be afraid to add a measure to this goal. Things such as age, annual salary, number of children or ex-partners etc are all things you can measure that may be important to you.

3. The goal should be appropriate and there should be a very good reason you want it. Create a list of as many reason why having this person in your life is important to you and how this will make you feel. When you achieve this goal, will it affect anybody else in a negative way such as your children and family culture etc.

4. Be realistic! If you fancy Brad Pitt or Cheryl Cole then what is the chances of marrying them? If you feel that it is a realistic possibility, then great! Otherwise make sure the goal is possible for you, that way you can remain motivated that your goal will be achieved.

5. When would you realistically like to have met this person? Set a time to this goal that is realistic and takes into consideration all the other things happening in your life right now.

6. All goals should be written down. Don’t just think it – ink it, as this ensures you have fully digested and understood who you are asking for. The goal should also be stated in the present tense as if you have already achieved it.

Relationship Goal Example
Today is Oct 29th 2012 and I am married to the woman of my dreams who has blonde hair, blue eyes, is 5’10” tall and is a size 12. She is sexy, smart and loving. She works as a doctor helping other people and earns £50k or more.
What’s your Goal? Take action and follow the steps above.
In my next article we’ll look at how to be more attractive so that you can meet that special one. Happy goal setting.

Adam

Adam Eccleston works professionally as a confidence coach helping people achieve more in life. Visit his website for more information. www.adameccleston.com